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Faith August

Blogger on life

Welcome to my ramblings, from a mind that’s been broken and rebuilt a fair few times now.

All views and musings are my own.

Stop Walking on Egg Shells

Have you ever had one of those relationships with a partner, sibling, parent, friend, where you have to watch what you say or do? With fear in every action, waiting to say or do the wrong thing, waiting for that explosion. Yeah? That’s what toxic relationships are. Fear of being cut adrift? That’s a hold over you no one should ever have. You are your own person, you are strong, brave, fierce and you are allowed an opinion that others don’t like. It took me to get to 40 years old to realise, I’m living my life for me! Only me! If you want to cut me adrift, go ahead. Expect me to bow to your opinion as though it is the only one that matters? No! Take charge of you. No more walking on eggshells, find people who are accepting of you, your choices, your life. Accept others in theirs! I am in no way saying cut those toxic people out of your life, keep room open for them, one day they may realise that happiness is also dependant on happiness.

For example. Your the only happy person in a room, do you allow others to negatively affect you? Or do you smile, listen, ask people what plans they have? Focus on positives. Positivity spreads. It’s true smiling is contagious.

life’s a swing, up and down.

It’s strange how perceptions are formed. One minute you could be such a wonderful person, then in a moment of defensive anger, you say hurtful things, you know you didn’t mean them, the other person (hopefully) does too. But where does that leave you? It makes the perception of you vulnerable. You haven’t changed, they haven’t changed but what if their perception of you in that one moment changes?

Well that’s all it is. A perception.

You can not change what others think of you, just live your best life! Don’t let the negativity affect you, prove them wrong in all your actions.

If this persons opinion doesn’t change, does it say more about them? I’d say yes, they are still holding onto the anger in that moment, they won’t remember how it got to that point, only the moment because, let’s face it, it’s so much easier to remember bad things over good. You don’t need to change, they do.

Don’t push them, carry on, do your good deeds, be happy. You let go of that anger and hate and this is something we all need to learn how to do. How can we move forward when we only see the past.

Me carrying the weight of an ice cream as it’s for me more suitable.

Yesterday was a bad day.

It only has to start with one thing if you loose that positivity. But I had a barrage. I was coping well at first; family disagreement, the decorator matched my wallpaper up wrong on a full wall, my daughter had been bullied online, my husband went to look at some work we had subcontracted and it has to be re-done, my hip and back pain was horrendous and the heat was making me feel sickly. (Why don’t homes in the UK have air con as standard?)

Then because my daughter was upset I broke down. I went to bed thinking about the day and hurting.

This morning my friend messaged, she said ‘You are ENOUGH’, she’s right. Today will be better. I can cope. I will be positive! The wallpaper is going back on the wall (correctly), yes it’s hot, fuck it, fat legs out, shorts on. Daughter still stressed, remind her she is beautiful, she is enough, she doesn’t need those people for her own happiness. World, we got this, let’s go smile and laugh and be free.


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